Picture of my parents two years ago last November!
How much time do we have seems to be a question we don't know or don't really want to know. This picture above was taken last Sunday of my niece Kim and sister Penny! Since then mom has totally became confused and we just don't know how much time we have until she doesn't know us. When her hip broke last month we found out the cancer is in the liver... No matter how much time you think you have to prepare you cant! I am so saddened each day and at the end of the day I say I am so tired of being sad... I want my mom back so so bad it hurts to breathe.. She is in no pain and that comforts me but in trade we have to watch her lose her right mind. However the hospice nurse says it is her disease and not the meds.. Oh mama how I love you so very much.. This is the way of life right but I am not ready!!!!
My dad is in Eugene and to drive there takes 45mins to an hour and he might wake up and might not. He continues to lose weight and it saddens me so that they are not together and that I might if I am lucky see him twice a month. His Alzheimer's condition is severely advanced and he will continue to sleep more and more... I miss my dad so so much.. This is the way of life right but I am not ready!!!!
I try to stay positive and still continue to function and go to work but I am so sad especially when my sister Penny is in the same pain I am in, along with all my siblings and extended family... I pray for peace and comfort for all and I believe last night I heard a voice say you are not alone, I will not leave you! That comforts me also..
Good news my nephew Jacob left ICU yesterday after 5 long weeks as of Monday and might be transferred next week to the facility my mom is in. I pray for his speedy recovery as he has a long road ahead.. Thanks for listening to me today! Blessings Pam